The August 9th issue of GolfWorld Magazine includes the headline “PGA Tour to give cell phones a listen.” The story relates that this month’s Wyndham Championship (previously called the Greater Greensboro Open) will allow spectators to bring in cell phones. However, the phones must be left in silent mode and calls must be made in designated areas only. As they say on the radio from time to time, “This is a test.” What I say is “Good luck.”
This story allows me to share a poem I wrote a while ago called “Cellphone-itis.”
Before the cell phone came to town
Calls were made with care
Phone booths now have emptied out
The cell is everywhere
Its use has borne an odd disease
Known as cellphone-itis
The symptoms are the opposite
Of simple laryngitis.
To have their voices clearly heard
When calling on a cell
Users seem to be agreed
That they must always yell.
But for their captive listeners
These polluters are no joke
What they add to the environment
Is matched only by second hand smoke.
So now that the ban on cellphones has been lifted, will the PGA Tour consider a ban on on-course smoking?