Since Tiger Woods has retreated from PGA Tour events, golf “scholars,” have offered Tiger a wide array of “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” to bring him back to championship form. Some have suggested that Tiger is finished as a front runner. As I have remarked in other Posts, maybe 100 years ago, situations like Tiger’s would be commented on not only in prose, but also in poetry. Since I am currently the (self-appointed) resident golf poet, here is my contribution regarding Tiger’s troubles:
Tiger Should or Shouldn’t
The ailing failing Tiger Woods
Is being hounded by the “shoulds”
Should do this, should do that
To get away from where he’s at.
He should Harmon-ize again,
But this is now and that was then.
He should get his head on straight,
It’s not his swing, let’s not conflate.
Tiger Woods should come alive,
Else golfing revenues take a dive.
The “shouldn’t” folks are out there too
Telling Woods what not to do.
He shouldn’t bulk up quite so much,
It’s causing him to lose his touch.
He shouldn’t listen to any coach
Trusting instead in his own approach.
Or maybe Tiger shouldn’t care
And just move his glutes to a rocking chair.
But I’m bettin’ when Tiger comes back
He won’t look like any hack.
Leon S White, PhD
And for those who would like to practice their oral poetry reading skills,